A Letter To A Friend – The Art of Noticing “Real” Friends

Today is Day 22

Dear You,

I want to proclaim you, rejoice you, celebrate you and delight in you. Have you seen this series, here, this 31 Days, The Art of Noticing? Well my dear today is Day 22 and today is your birthday. Here ,this tribute is for you, to you, your heart, your soul but above all, your amazing ability to draw on the gifts and life around you. To ingest them, invest  them by serving and loving. Here is your bursday present. You know how much I adore the you I have grown to know and love.

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You know we could discuss the title. For hours. What is a real friend anyway. And we could debate the meaning of true and real. Afterall what is a unreal friend. You know maybe you are an unreal friend.

Do you remember last year on October 22, your birthday, I wrote a little letter to you, here, it was called Encouragement, A Letter To A Friend.  A few people read that letter, 2,028 to be exact from around the interweb. And you and I would scratch our heads and wonder how they found this place and the letter I wrote to you. And we’d probably agree how happy we are a few more people discovered when your birthday is. That is good. Or maybe we’d celebrate the fact they they get to hear my testimony to what you are and who you are to this world, and especially me.

That was a year ago. People forget. And we hate it when people repeat themselves. It is so boring. So gauche. And so not charming. So I won’t say it exactly like I did last year. They can go back and read that post. H, do you know the reason this blog is here. Because you are an encourager. And you serve up straight talk without a side of sugar coating. You are a giver, not a taker, an inexhaustible source of encouraging words and actions. You told me I had to write. Your words were stronger than that. Gentle and bold. Sure and certain.

So it is only appropriate for this to be the place to weave words, string them along and along, like the strand of pearls you so faithfully wear. And that you would have a day. Day 22. Do you like that.
You would goad me and tease me and remind me to always point to Him. So I will, He has saved our backsides and frontsides and insides so many times. And loved us. Always loved us with mercy and grace. And you, his hands and feet, have saved me from despair and sadness. Confusion and the “I’m about to have a nervous breakdown but it is just so damn inconvenient right now” times.

So is that a real friend? One who loves through the dark and delights in the times of light and laughter. Bridges the bleak times and weak times, the  times of want, crossing over to the times of plenty.

There are no shortages of those. By his grace. And we like those better don’t we. The times on the porch, at the farm, in the creek, at Secret Beach, where we can have olive shell contests and laugh and dream and scheme and relish the in between. We prefer the days of poetry and praise, of watching our children grow, fall in love, accomplish a task, overcome a set back, bring home a friend who gives life and knows Truth. Become a woman or a man, of God.

We’d prefer to float in our boats with our men. To leave behind the worry of work and the pressures of life. To see them exhale and breathe in salt air. To open a beer and slip in a lime and wiggle our toes and let go of time. To see the very last streak of orange and pink. To  stay off shore until we have to come in. To turn up the music and dance crazy silly in our hearts.

And we  go without days, though painful and dry, without talking or saying a word. But running on fumes of love that is stored. Deep in the places where friendship is placed. Though trials have come, some that are too awful to name, we know in our knowers that if we face them again, we can and we will. Because we are real friends.

And you know I would say it again, like I did before. If you go first, save me a seat. And warm a Charleston Green rocker with a wonderful view of the sea. Because we know our God well and we know our God deep. And there is no way  in this world that His heaven won’t have a wonderful view of the porpoise and shrimp boats on Jeremy Creek.

I love you. You bless me every single day of my life. I can’t remember before I knew you but I know there were years. You make life exciting and beautiful, glamorous and fantabulous.

Happy birthday, H. If you go first I will never forgive you. But then you would insist that I do. So okay I will. But I’d rather you not leave me a day on this earth, to live and to breathe and to celebrate living.

Take care of yourself.
Happy Day of Your Birth

I love you, I do. Happy Day 22.

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(Today is Day 22. Thank you as always for being here, for following along on this journey. If you wish to leave a birthday wish to my precious friend H, I will pass it on to her. She is my confidant, my accountability partner, my sister in Christ, and my closest friend. We raise children and husbands together and walk out our faith together with love and friendship and lots and lots of words between us.)

Harriett and I and the cross

Gazing At The Ordinary Marvelous

Today is Day Poetic 

Have you noticed a little quiet pause. Is it bending or breaking the 31 Days “code of writing to triple up” one post to cover three days in the series. Ah, I have been living and traveling and noticing. And thinking of this place and space while it was quiet. Were you out noticing while it was quiet? Have you even noticed that I was gone?

Today is Day 21 ( and 20 and 19)

wpid-IMG_20130814_185820.jpgGazing at The Ordinary Marvelous

I have wondered through a maze of noticing
Sat on every word unfurled from  preacher’s lips
Not mine, on prayer, unending
Every note, black, ballet dancer up and down
That old red hymnal, still smells like memories of Methodist
Smells a certain way
Doxology dances off the yellow pages, runs rifts
Of remembering ordinary marvelous
Weaves a red thread through the years and days

And I have wandered through a maze of bittersweet
Returning with my fragile heart and mind
I long to change a memory
Bur, for all my trying I can’t rewrite it
Into something better, brighter, sweeter
Babys at the alter, dipped in sacred fonts
Will stir the waters that run deep
Inside a mother’s  broken heart

I have wondered through the winding
Roads that lead me home to Woodland Heights
Where I am met with fond recalling
Early morning, late at night
Bookended by the generations
Stories that go on and on, echoing down the mountain
There are no secrets anymore
Rolling tires crunch  crush the brittle leaves
A slow and gentle breaking
On this road to my returning
I have come back home again, met by autumn’s gold dust shining
She opens wide the door for me.

Everything is ordinary
Marvelous as it should be
Concentric circles of recalling
Spokes that find their way back to the center
Tines which gently poke inside, time and time again
Urge me to recall while listening to the echo of
The winsome valley train

Everything is marvelous
The circles spin like hands clockwise round the rounded clock
Face the moments, ordinary
Savor all the pieces of the past
Colliding with the present
All this noticing
Never seems to stop
For if it did and if it were
If the door to my eyes and memory
Were to close and come to final rest
Death would meet me at the end of marvelous
Where all the ordinary  settles into peacefulness

While time presents herself
At daybreak, new and wondrous once again
I  go forth to gather
All the ordinary marvelous
Where we sing  loud and joyful
A searcher’s song, a hymn of praise
Let Noticing her loud and lively anthem raise.

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(To read all posts in this 31 day series, The Art of Noticing, click here to land on Day One and a listing of all posts) I am joinging The Nester at The Nester dot com for October. Click here to check out some of the other writers/bloggers who are accepting this writing challenge. There are some wonderful writers participating in several cool categories.

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Joining Laura Boggess at Laura Boggess dot com . It is where I go on Mondays for a writer’s Playdate.

In The Beginning There Were Questions

Welcome. I just noticed you stopped by. Are you visiting? Did you stumble here? Did you come by way of The Nester’s 31 Day Series Home Page? Are you a subscriber? Maybe you’d like to follow on facebook or twitter. Scroll down to the bottom of the page where I think you will find it easy to do just that. And you  may click on the  Subscribe tab at the top to receive posts daily. Its pure delight to travel this road together. ( Click here to see all the posts in this series beginning with the Introduction posted on September 30.)

In the beginning there were questions. Questions like why 31 days of noticing?. Why follow here when there are thousands of places to choose to read – books, web sites,, blogs,  magazines, and more blogs. 

This is not for every one, this writing series. Here. At Elizabeth W. Marshall, poetry and prose through a lens of grace. But everyone is cordially invited. Maybe you will pick up a word nugget, or slip a piece of fragile phrasing that sings to your heart. And place it in your pocket. Maybe you will be inspired by poetry or prose. Maybe your day will be richer by feasting on a photograph of God-beauty. Or perhaps you will find time to sit for a magical moment, to digest a song.

Or if you are like me, perhaps you yearn for, hunger for, a place to be still and meditative. Every day will be a little different. Some quiet. Some a little spicier and louder. But never too loud. Noticing requires a bit of stillness. Hushed spaces give our souls room to breath.

Thank you for choosing this place for your October. It takes engaging all of our senses to maximize the art of noticing. Deep breaths of God-beauty and His peace.  Let’s begin. There is a bench along the way if you grow weary. Just sit down. I saved one especially for you.

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Last night I opened the front door. It creaked a tired creak, parroting my own weary frame. I exhaled my day, stepped off the small front stoop and felt Autumn whisper with her cool breath. October is almost here, nighttime blew the words into my soul with her cool dark exhale. I have a gift for you. All you have to do is find the energy to look up. The sky holds a surprise.

As I gave my dogs a short last romp in the grass, the moon lassoed me. Between the tree tops I felt her take my chin and point it skyward. Wooing me to see a moon the shape, width and breadth of a clipped baby fingernail. Lit up and pinned against ebony. Surrounded by twinkling almost-October stars, spread out and winking, blinking. Shining  like a child’s art project. I smelled the Elmer’s glue holding the glitter in place. Creativity had just birthed a masterpiece in the night sky. A creation worthy of placing on my refrigerator. Under a magnet.  A study on the solar system, black construction paper and all the embellishments any craft box holds.. It seemed  created , especially for me.

My night would begin its end with a heavenly art project. My face slapped by cool wind. My heart quickened by Autumn smells. A gallery of glory. A private viewing in my very own front yard.

I have to remind myself. I need wide margins. That noticing comes from slowing down. Saving time and making room. So many years of my life were spent running. I spun like an animated Warner Brother’s character. My legs, Wylie Coyote. Roadrunner dusty blur. Blink and you miss. Blink and I missed.  I a whirling dervish. Like a hummingbird I lit hurriedly from place to place.

Life has taught me well to build wide margins in my living. And noticing with every fiber of me, it happens best when I make my margins school-girl wide. Set them fat and chunky. Build them in with wise intent. Design my day to save time for soaking in this very  season of my soul.

And the fuel that fed me was adrenaline. Dipping my beak into the flowers that kept my engines roaring fast, I flitted. I flew, my wings roaring with the sound of hurry.

I know me now. I know my soul needs space to notice. Little pieces of my insides feel less alive when I put my noticing on the top shelf in an old Uggs boot box. Something starts to stink. My noticing skills need to be excercised out in the open. To breath. Maybe yours do too.

Ready, set, go notice. 

(In the slowing down, feel free to record something from your  very own noticing in the comment box. I would love to hear your story of noticing).

Trinity

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A poem of mine, Trinity, is featured today  at Burnside Writer’s Collective. Will you continue reading over there. Come explore the poetry and prose which is this fascinating collective featuring words routed in the Christian Faith.

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Trinity

Math is not my friend
We buck heads over answers
That must be right or wrong
Gray does not exist in the minds of the
Mathematically-minded

There is a narrowing, whittling to the n’th degree
The theology of numbers
Has no room for interpretation
Or personal history
But I know this to be True
Three is holy

And three is my friend
But who’s counting
My three children
One watched Count Dracula
With me, on Sesame Street
Math served up with sugar coated ease………

Continue reading the poem, Trinity, where it appears in its entirity at Burnside Writer’s Collective. Click here for the link to follow Trinity and poetry. Thanks for joining me on this poetic adventure.

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